So I’ve been in a shit mood for probably a week now and it just WON’T go away. Had a fight with my bf this morning and he left pissed off- and I don’t even care. I’ll never be able to trust him because of what he’s done. He was HORRIBLE. And even though he’s trying to be a better person, I can’t believe him. I just don’t. Because of all the shit he pulled before. He used to hurt me. He doesn’t now because he got arrested for assaulting his ex girlfriend and her new man. He could be telling the truth about being faithful but something tells me not to trust. Even if he was, I wouldn’t put it past him to try and pull off little shit just for sport because I’ve suspected for a long time that he has or ‘had’ borderline personality disorder. He’s a real good actor and a bit of an attention whore. I don’t think he would turn down female attention. On top of that, he gets to keep in touch with ex-girlfriends and flips out about my having male friends- whom I can no longer be around without his accompaniment. Yet, he can still have contact with his exes. Read the rest of this entry »

So far there are three girls that are scared of me. I am not that strange but they avoid me at all cost. I deserve an award or something because I bet it is a record.

I really want to be raped tell me why

I’ve been clean off heroin for a couple months now,
but every day I think about it, the way it made me feel, and the the low lives I had the pleasure of meeting on my mission to buy it. I wasn’t just addicted to the drug I was addicted to the life style, walking around north Philly at 4:30 am, hearing gun shots watching as the drug dealers dragged out the junkie that just OD in their living room, just wondering if next time is that gonna be me. It didn’t make thing easier that i had a partner in crime, the girl who first introduced me to the drug making sure no one robbed her,raped her,or what ever else came across their sick minds. and it felt like i was addicted to her.going to meet up wit her dealer and giving me a bag like it was me award for going with her. will I use heroin again I don’t know, hopefully not.

Erik T. doesn’t get it. Living with him is much worse than being a hooker.

Erik is an abusive, violent petty tyrant- everything has to be his way- & he’s cheap! For some strange reason he thinks he’s God’s gift to women- he’s not- he’s an ugly OLD jerk! He lies about his age- says he’s 42 when he’s actually almost 50 years old.

Erik is lousy in bed- does the same old boring thing every time. The drugs & alcohol have taken their toll- not only on his face & scrawny, wasted body, but he can’t get it up.

Who wants to live with someone who hits them, tells them what to do, treats them like slave labor & doesn’t have any manners?

Yes, Erik T., I’d rather be a hooker than be stuck with you!

I didn’t know what it was, i thought it was a game.
Till i found out what sex was..
and then i found out what rape was.
And i will never
EVER
Get over it
But the only person i have told, in my whole life.
And ive been here 16 years.

My brother didn’t exactly molest me… He took off his pants around me and paraded around with a long white thing. He put my hand to it. He touched my butt. He pinched my butt. He ran upstairs and got naked. He would hug me close. He would come in my room and refuse to leave. He also went through the stuff in my bathroom, and I am not sure why. Is that molesting me? IS THAT MOLESTING ME? Because I don’t know what to call it. I just say my brother molested me.

I thought originally that finally I had something that would make me have power over him: to hold this over his head if he tried to hurt me. I hoped he didn’t realize that nothing would happen to him if I told.

I told him I was interested a few months ago.  We decided to “try
things”.  We went on a few dates, I spent a few nights at his house.  I fell
asleep in his arms and woke up in the same place.  Actually, we’d both
wake up around the same time, separated from one another, but he’d
sleepily pull me close to him again so we could wake up together when his
alarm would go off.  He kissed me in private, and he kissed me like he
meant it. Read the rest of this entry »