I was never afraid of death until I became a mom… I often think about how I can never give my daughter the life she deserves. I’ve messed up everything in my life & am afraid I will do the same to her. I just want to die. I think about it alot, but at the same time I’m so scared to leave her. I just want to know that she will be ok and happy. It would be soo much easier if someone could just kill me. My daughter is the only good thing I’ve ever done and I just don’t want her to have the life I had. Read the rest of this entry »

My mum has severe depression, I’ve heard her telling my dad she wants to die
shes been in and out of psychiatric hospital and everywhere
i take it our on her though
i blame her for not being there when i needed her
i blame her for leaving me with him
i blame her for not having a stable mum
i blame her for not having a mum like my friends have
i know deep down she cant help it sometimes
but i still blame her
the thing is giving birth to me is the reason she suffers
her hormones messed up after giving birth to me and she developed depression and it gradually got worse
i still blame you though.